Relationship Chronicles: 5

Good afternoon readers!

 I know I am late on this post, but I decided to sleep in today for the first time in a while! Now, lets get to this Relationship Chronicles: 5!

Like many, I have been in a few toxic relationships in the past. If I would have realized what was going on in front of my eyes, I could have saved myself from torture. If you know like I know, a toxic relationship is everything but fun. If it's toxic, detoxify your life and leave! This is not a gender specific post. This goes for ANYONE who may need some insight! Here are some signs to look out for...

7 Signs You're in a Toxic Relationship

1. Someone in the relationship is keeping score: If you or your partner are keeping tabs on how many arguments you have in a day or how many times you or the other messes up, it's time to call it quits.
2. They make you feel stupid: Your partner should never, I repeat, NEVER tear you down. Their job is to encourage, motivate, and bring you up. They should NEVER make you feel bad about the way you do certain things, certain foods you like, or certain hobbies you have. Doing this is a good reason to walk away.
3. Can't take responsibility: Every time there is an argument, your partner never seems to be able to admit when they are wrong, say good bye because that will NEVER change. Grown adults are able to take responsibility for their own actions. If your partner can't do that, well, you have an emotionally immature teenager on your hands if you ask me.
4. Constant break-up threats: If you or your partner can't fully express your emotional needs or feelings without the fear of them causing conflict between you two, then you're definitely in a toxic relationship. Do they say things like," I can't be with someone that doesn't understand!" instead of saying,"It really bothers me when you don't understand where I am coming from." Think about that.
5. Name calling is normal: No, I am not talking about pet names like "baby","bae","sweetie", and "dear". I am talking about the names that are meant to either consciously or purposely hurt you. That is verbal abuse and it is one of the main things look out for. Negative name calling back and forth is not something you do to someone you love or care about. End it!
6. They go MIA: When you are in a relationship and you have an argument or fight, running away or ignoring the person for days at a time that you "love" and "care" about is a definite no-no! If your partner can disappear on you (or if you live with them once you do something to upset them they ignore you for DAYS or even WEEKS) and pick up whenever THEY SEE FIT like nothing ever happened in the first place, then this person needs to go MIA and NEVER return! In my opinion, this is so immature. I have experienced this myself and it is definitely an eye opener of treatment that you will continue to have from this person. Trust me when I tell you, this childish act wont change and you will see how it takes a toll on you after a while if you decide to stay. 
7. You are NOT allowed to grow: People change overtime. As we get older, we start to figure ourselves out. Goals my change, things we value may change, and things we want out of life may change. In a relationship, your partner should be willing to accept and embrace your change. It would be even better if they could change and grow with you. If they try to hold you back from your dreams and goals or try to tare you down and stop you from growing, it's time to move on and grow without them!

That's it readers! I hope you enjoyed! If this helped anyone at all that read this, I have done my job!

I want to kow your thoughts or any of your experiences with a toxic relationship and what you did to get out of it. Talk to me!

xoxo,

The Rambling Tea☕

Read the original article here: Glamour

Talk of The Town: Are You Afraid of the Dark?;Snapchat Hacked!!

All of my 90's kids, remember this?!

This show used to give me the heebie geebies growing up! But, I still would watch it every time it played on Nickelodeon. If you ever want to watch every episode you can catch them on Amazon Prime which costs money(lame) or you can watch EVERY SINGLE EPISODE ON YOUTUBE for free! How awesome is that?! Just in time for Halloween too! Some genius on Reddit discovered this to be true and I can't thank them enough! I will be watching every episode just to see if they are just as scary now as they were when I was a kid.

If you don't live under a rock, you know what Snapchat is. But did you know that it was hacked?! Yes, according to CBS this morning, hackers are set to leak 100,000 unauthorized snapchat photos including nude ones. If you know like I know, there are a lot of Snapchat users and I am very sure that some of these users are underaged and sending nudes. 4.6 million Snapchat usernames and phone numbers were leaked online last January so this isn't the first time that Snapchat has been a target for being hacked. Apparently, this hackers were able to obtain photos from a third party app that some users used to store photos. The name of this app hasn't been confirmed yet. Here's what the owners of Snapchat had to saw,"We can confirm that Snapchat's servers were never breached and were not the source of these leaks," the company stated on Twitter. "Snapchatters were victimized by their use of third-party apps to send and receive Snaps, a practice that we expressly prohibit in our ToU [Terms of Use agreement]." Hmph, I don't even feel sorry for the people sending nudes over Snapchat of all places anyway. Especially since all of this hacking crap is going on.

What are your thoughts?

Thanks for reading!

xoxo,

The Rambling Tea☕

Relationship Chronicles: 4

5 Ways To Understand What You NEED Out of A Relationship

1. Define your core values: Our core values are the foundation of who we are. In order to know these, you have to truly know yourself and what you strongly believe in and want for your life. Things that are the most important to you in other words. Core values can be: marriage, family, your career, religious beliefs, even how you feel about honesty, trust, and fidelity and the importance they have in a relationship. It would benefit you if the person you're interested in has these same values.
2. Understand your emotional needs: These needs define the finer points of our relationships. Emotional needs are just as important as core values. Maybe you seek the need for intimacy and satisfying sexuality, the need to be honored, and the need to be accepted by your partner. Find someone who meets those needs. Find someone who understands their role in fulfilling those needs. 
3. Identify your love pattern: Finding someone that meets your emotional needs and core values is a plus. Now it's time to understand what you have received from your precious relationships that have brought the best out in you. Growth, fulfillment, safety, security, and the act of being yourself are good things to consider when focusing on your own personal love pattern. Relationships that contribute to positivity, happiness( although things wont always be sunshine and unicorns), and make you feel good are the types that should be sought after. 
4. Test drive a POTENTIAL relationship: Look inside yourself. Find out what's inside of you that will attract the right person for you. Apply what you find to seek a partner. But be careful because doing this can bring on mistakes. Make sure not to ONLY consider good looks and a likable personality as a way to determine if this person is what you need before you actually know them. Don't let your head and heart go in opposite directions when making your decision because your heart will when every time. I guarantee it! Once you have figured this all out, you can "free trial run" the relationship first and just date. This will help your emotional state and give you time to get to know the person before you get too serious.
5. Once you're dating, go in for a three-month checkup:  If the relationship is going well from your observation, start dating more seriously after two months. However,  don't get too comfortable because just like a new car, it is time to get the "three-month checkup". Do this for about 3-4 months. Ask yourself if this person is still holding up to the same standards as you initially thought they had when you first met. If not, pay attention. These early on signs are red flags. Cut your losses before any more valuable time is wasted. If the person is still the same, continue on dating more exclusively. 

I really hope that this was beneficial to someone. We all should sit back and think about what we need in a relationship vs what we THINK we need. A lot of the time we settle for what we want even if it isn't beneficial to us. I hope you enjoyed!

Thanks for reading!

xoxo,

The Rambling Tea☕

Read the original article here

Good Morning!

Happy Saturday!

 I'm sure some of you are probably not even up yet or are suffering from a hangover currently! While most of you were enjoying your Friday, I was at home and in the bed early. The old me would feel badly about that but, I have no complaints. I am currently preparing for some life changing experiences which you all will hear about soon! I am so excited about them and I cant wait to share them with you all!

Anywho, whether you're sleeping in, watching Saturday moring cartoons, getting out and staying busy today, doing the cleaning for the week, or working today, I hope your day is wonderful!

Enjoy your day!

xoxo,

The Rambling Tea☕

Good morning!

T.G.I.F.!

We made it! This week went by so fast! I am so glad it did because it almost seemed as if there was no light at the end of the tunnel. This week has been tiring, hectic, and stressful, but it is almost over! Now, lets get this awesome day started!

I hope everyone has a great day and if not, try your best to make it great!

xoxo,
The Rambling Tea☕

Relationship Chronicles:3

6 Relationship Red Flags

1. Still living at home: Ok, so you met a guy that you like and everything is going great. He invites you over to his place for dinner. You accept, of course. Knock on the door and find that his parents are also over there. This is their house and his mom cooked the meal. Pause! A grown man should not still be living at home with his parents. This is a sign that he's not read to grow up, financially irresponsible and is depending on his parents, or is just a bum. The ONLY EXCEPTION would be that he lost his job and is temporarily down or is taking care of ill parents. Any other reason, RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN!
2. NEVER invites you over: Nice guy, attractive, adores you, and treats you nice. You have been out to the movies a few times and he has been to your place multiple times. It's been a few months and you're wondering when he will invite you over or take you somewhere other than the movies. Every time you ask, he tells you some lame excuse about how his house is getting renovated or something else lame. PAUSE! He clearly is either ashamed to be seen with you in a well lit place, has a double life, or has a wife and kid at home! Either way, save yourself the trouble and move on!
3. Moving TOO Quickly: A guy you have been seeing for about a week now, is telling you all the right things and making all of the right gestures. He treats you like a Queen and already talks about marrying you! PAUSE! Ok, granted I believe in love at first sight, but seriously?? This guy is either crazy, an ax murderer, looking for a woman to help solve his problems, desperate, or afraid to be alone. He will probably be obsessive and possessive or maybe even aggressive and controlling. UNLESS it's love at first sight, drop him like a hot potato!
4. CONSTANTLY Bad Mouths His EX: Say that you're with a guy that you really like. He has this ex-girlfriend that really hurt him in the past but he can't seem to let it go. Every conversation he talks about things that she used to do that bothered him, or maybe even the countless times that she hurt him. He always compares something that you do to something that she did and almost always immediately gets upset about it. PAUSE! First off, he shouldn't still be talking about her because she's an EX regardless. If he is in a new relationship she shouldn't even be a factor. Plus, he compares you two which is another RED FLAG. Him badmouthing her makes him look tacky, resentful, and has some underlying anger issues. Not to mention the fact that he probably isn't still over her. If this is the case, then THOU SHALL MOVE ON TO THE NEXT!
5. MOMMAS BOY: You're in a relationship with this guy who is great. You really like him and its obvious that he likes you too. The only problem is he is always at his moms house, always on the phone with his mother, lets his mother get involved in everything that he does and she kind of resents you. PAUSE! This is not a good relationship to be in because now you are the "other woman". He is too attached to his mother and if you think there is a future in that, think again girl! He will more than likely put her before you and your relationship, she will be able to meddle in your lives and this will make things even worse. Especially if you get married. This will have you both in awkward positions and my advice to you is to LOOK ELSEWHERE!
6. Fresh Out of a Relationship: Great guy, nice, and attractive. You two have been dating for about 1 month now. He wants to make it official, but fails to remember that he told you a month ago that he had just got out of a relationship. PAUSE! Anyone fresh out of a relationship needs time to heal themselves before getting back out there in the relationship world. Time heals everything. If you decide to go through with being his girlfriend, more than likely you will be a rebound. He has not had enough time to completely focus on himself, so he wont be able to focus on you. He is still in the recovery stage from his ex. You will only be his temporary fix to fill his loneliness. Give him time to get his life together, and then think about going steady. But for now, smooth sail yourself away from that island of misery!

Ladies, I hope that this was helpful and I hope it was enjoyable to read! Guys, I didn't forget about you. I will make a list for you all as well soon! 

Thanks for reading!

xoxo,

The Rambling Tea☕

Original here: Lifestyle

Talk of the Town:Paula Patton Files For Divorce; Stephen Collins Molestation Trial, Ex-Wife and Divorce

Yesterday, TMZ reported that Paula Patton filed for divorce from her cheating and soon to be ex-husband, Robin Thicke.

                                                                                           (justjared.com)

 I know everyone remembers Thicke' and his shenanigans from last year and earlier this year. Well, Patton had enough and decided to serve him those "papers'. Luckily for Thicke, Patton is willing to file for joint LEGAL and PHYSICAL custody of their son. Patton claims the date of initial seperation was February 21.

Read more: here TMZ:Paula Patton Files For Divorce

According to TMZ, Stephen Collins could end up in the clear as far as the New York investigation goes, but his molestation charges will end up being faced in his divorce trial from Faye Grant.

Sources told TMZ that Grant is set to present evidence during the divorce trial, including the audiotape with Collins admitting to the molestation of 3 girls. Her plan is to convince the judge to immediately separate her from Collins to insure that she is protected from losing any assets. Basically, she wants to save herself from losing any money if the victims decide to take legal action against Collins. 

Grant also has been accused of persuading a witness to FALSELY claim that he/she saw Collins molest a girl that is not one of the 3 he admitted to molesting on the audiotape. Once the witness refused, Grant retaliated against the witness. Attorney Mark Vincent Kaplan told TMZ that the witness will testify in the November divorce trial. 

First off, these molestation allegations, as well as the audiotape with Stephen Collins' confession are only coming out because of the divorce which makes both Grant and Collins disgusting individuals in my eyes. Grant has known about her ex husband for all of these years and has said NOTHING. If ANY legal action is taken against Collins, the victims should come for Grant as well because she knew about them. Plus, Grant is only outing her husband to protect herself from losing money!They both deserve jail time if you ask me because if Grant knew about this and said/did nothing, she might as well have been the one doing the same thing!

What are your thoughts about this?

Thanks for reading!

xoxo, 

The Rambling Tea☕

You can read the original articles here:

TMZ: Stephen Collins vs. Ex Wife and Lies TMZ: Stephen Collins Molestation Trial and Divorce